Okay so I have terrible hair...and mind you I'm not saying this out of some self-loathing. I am stating the truth. I have very thick (both in terms of quantity and quality) curly, unmanageable hair. Now I don't know how to wear it. I can't cut it short because it doesn't have any fall and it will stand up straight. I can't keep it too long because it is unmanageable. Usually I have to keep it sort of moderate in length and tied in order to not appear like a witch.
Now I come from a middle-class south-Indian family. My mother did not have any exposure in terms of beauty products or grooming your hair etc. My whole childhood passed with my long-hair braided together into a plait. Add big glasses to that and I was the epitome of a geek that cannot be remotely imagined as a sexual being :P Suited me well because I was so not into guys...or girls :) Thinking back, I guess I was indeed a geek.
But fast-forward time to now. I wear better clothes (though still very plain according to my female companions), I got rid of the glasses and my hairstyle has promoted from a braid to a pony. So far so good. But I can't seem to find a haircut that I am brave enough to try that will look good on me. I do think cutting it too short is not the answer (anyway I don't want a boyish haircut...I have enough boyish things about me and I don't need another addition). So at the moment I just get it cut into layers and keep it a bit below shoulder-length.
However, it would do me good if I went to the hair-dresser frequently...or rather not as infrequently as I currently do. Actually...I avoid a hairdresser fervently. There, I said it. Why? Why when I need them so badly? :P Well, it's the hairdryer. I know it's silly but hey I really am in a quandary in this case so hear me out. Thank God for the anonymity that this blog offers I am free to admit that I don't know how to use a blow-dryer! Seriously I suck at it! Add to that my terrible hair that needs the perfect blow-drying technique in order for me to not end up looking like I've been electrocuted. So either I have to shell out extra money to get it styled by the hairdresser (which I also don't like because they tweak it so much that it looks great for a few hours but ends up looking ten times worse once the effect wears out) or I have to do it myself (a nightmare!).
Ugh...first world problems many would say but trust me something like this can consume your peace of mind because everyday you look in the mirror and you go "Gosh I'm a few days away from becoming a cavewoman...I really need a haircut". Then you go "Ah to hell with the hair-drying crap". And it's a vicious cycle to the point you fear your bf will break up with you if you went without a haircut for another single day. Then you make the leap, make one of the choices and be like "AH FREEDOM AT LAST FOR A FEW WEEKS".
Now I come from a middle-class south-Indian family. My mother did not have any exposure in terms of beauty products or grooming your hair etc. My whole childhood passed with my long-hair braided together into a plait. Add big glasses to that and I was the epitome of a geek that cannot be remotely imagined as a sexual being :P Suited me well because I was so not into guys...or girls :) Thinking back, I guess I was indeed a geek.
But fast-forward time to now. I wear better clothes (though still very plain according to my female companions), I got rid of the glasses and my hairstyle has promoted from a braid to a pony. So far so good. But I can't seem to find a haircut that I am brave enough to try that will look good on me. I do think cutting it too short is not the answer (anyway I don't want a boyish haircut...I have enough boyish things about me and I don't need another addition). So at the moment I just get it cut into layers and keep it a bit below shoulder-length.
However, it would do me good if I went to the hair-dresser frequently...or rather not as infrequently as I currently do. Actually...I avoid a hairdresser fervently. There, I said it. Why? Why when I need them so badly? :P Well, it's the hairdryer. I know it's silly but hey I really am in a quandary in this case so hear me out. Thank God for the anonymity that this blog offers I am free to admit that I don't know how to use a blow-dryer! Seriously I suck at it! Add to that my terrible hair that needs the perfect blow-drying technique in order for me to not end up looking like I've been electrocuted. So either I have to shell out extra money to get it styled by the hairdresser (which I also don't like because they tweak it so much that it looks great for a few hours but ends up looking ten times worse once the effect wears out) or I have to do it myself (a nightmare!).
Ugh...first world problems many would say but trust me something like this can consume your peace of mind because everyday you look in the mirror and you go "Gosh I'm a few days away from becoming a cavewoman...I really need a haircut". Then you go "Ah to hell with the hair-drying crap". And it's a vicious cycle to the point you fear your bf will break up with you if you went without a haircut for another single day. Then you make the leap, make one of the choices and be like "AH FREEDOM AT LAST FOR A FEW WEEKS".
Haha...i like the way you write. Good to hear that you got a BF. It doesn't hurt that he is good looking.
ReplyDeleteI we all have some looks-related issues, big or small.
I am a guy from the US. I don't think I am ugly (believe me, i have seen worse), but I am average. Problem is that I am in my late twenties and thin as hell, literally like a 16-17 yr old guy. My skeletal structure is such. I wonder if that makes a lot of potential girlfriends shy away because they don't want their bf to look like their kid brother. Never dated anyone till now. Maybe because I am ugly within...I am pretty open to most kinds of girls - weight, color, hair types. But she must be smart and funny. Anyway, lets see how things go.
Good luck and let your inner beauty speak for you.
Pencil man.
btw, i created an account just to post this message.
Hi! Thanks a lot for your message! So kind of you to take the trouble to create an account for this.
ReplyDeleteI chuckled at your nickname 'Pencil man' even though you just told how you feel about your thinness. By the way, I am thin too...but I guess that is considered a virtue for a girl. However, I have a pear-shaped body. But I am sick of people telling me 'Oh dear, you look so weak'. And these are people that I could easily beat in ANY sport they choose. Sigh...
Anyway, back to you. Well you should look at the bright side. Perhaps you will get a very young girlfriend ;) And you know what, you can't be ugly within because in my experience most people that are insecure about some aspect of their appearance compensate by trying harder to be kind and have a great personality. I am pretty sure you are a great guy. Perhaps your future gf is just turning 18 and you'll meet her soon ;)
Good luck! I'd love to hear it when you find someone :)
Hi... May God bless u fr u future
ReplyDeleteMy comment is a but late, but I also have curly, thick and seemingly unmanageable hair. However, I have grown to love it and now get compliments on it all the time.....and I never have to use a hair dryer. In fact, I don't even own one!
ReplyDeleteHere are some things you can try (I've been doing for years!):
-Condition hair daily with a moisturizing conditioner. Comb conditioner through hair in the shower (always comb from the ends and work your way up to prevent snapping/damage), leave in until the end of the shower and rinse with cool water.
-Shampoo hair AT MOST twice a week. More will dry out our beautiful curls!
-Apply a leave-in conditioner (or a small amount of regular conditioner) to hair by rubbing product with palms and sandwiching product-soaked palms around hair, pulling product from root to ends.....actually all product should be applied this way once once out of shower/bath...combing hair...even with fingers...will increase fizz.
-Apply a smooth wax pomade to hair. I like Paul Mitchell Wax Works and always get the Generic product from Sally's Beauty Supply, but I understand there may be different products in India.
-After all product is applied, wrap hair in towel (but don't pat hair with towel or attempt 'towel-drying') and wear on head for 3-5 mins (this is called 'plopping' - http://www.wikihow.com/Plop-Your-Hair). To save time, I just plop my hair after product and finish getting ready. By the time I'm finished, my hair is perfect!
-Limit touching hair and always it mostly air dry
Try this if you want to wear your beautiful curls out and watch the compliments pour in! :)
I forgot to mention - squeeze out the excess water from your hair before applying product. :)
DeleteHi there, just wanted to chime in what the previous poster has said about curly hair.
ReplyDeleteI'm Indian too and I have had the most unmanageable curly hair for most of my childhood. My mother had no idea how to look after curls, so what happened was that it was brushed into oblivion and cut very short. So I had what looked like a poofy dead cat on my head. I grew my hair long and then flat-ironed it for many years.
Affter six years, I grew tired of the farce and decided to go natural, only in my mind I called it "going real". I found this website - www.naturallycurly.com that really helped me with my hair journey. Now, like many of the women on that website who suffered and overcame our exact same issues, I have curls that straighties refuse to believe *didn't* come out of a salon.
Just keep an open mind and give your hair a chance. Tying it up all the time is not good, in later years the hairline will widen and then it will look bad. Set your hair free!
Embrace those curls sweetie... Once you start loving them, guys, girls, even traditional freaky aunties too will love them! XOXO P.S. Even i got a head covered in thick black curly mop :D Sisters!
ReplyDelete